The List
by The Lost and Found Box
Summary: /Valentines Day special! Not yaoi./ Bakura and Ryou now have their own seperate bodies and Bakura is making the best of it by making a list of things to do with a body. Next on the list? Take a girl out on a date.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or Pushing Daisies, and to my knowledge does not exist.**

**Warning: Slight 'Kura OOC-ness, and mention of Ryou being beaten.**

**Note: Happy Valentines day! This is also dedicated to NashiPlusDarkLink or whatever the frick you name is, to prove that Warriors stuff is not all I write! Hope you enjoy! – Nyeh**

The List

Oneshot

"I'm going to school, don't touch anything, don't kill anything and most importantly do not let anybody see you!" Ryou recited his list of rules to his yami once again, like he did everyday, before closing the door to his small apartment and heading of to school.

Bakura, of course, didn't hear him for he was to busy snoring on the couch. Unlike Ryou, who had some responsibility for things, he had none. He could stay up as late as he wanted and he could eat what he wanted. Which would explain the beer cans on the coffee table.

Of course, if you told the ex-thief king that he was getting side-tracked from his original plot to kill the Pharoah, avenge Kul Elna, get the millennium items, become supreme ruler of the world, stop the writers strike (he had come quite accustomed to this "Pushing Daisies" show, bringing people back from the dead with only a poke! What a novel idea! It would definetly save a lot of time in his quest!), and many others, he would most likely do something horrible and bloody to your body or just send you to the Shadow Realm. It depends if it's a full moon or not…

If, somehow, you did survive after making the comment, Ryou would just pipe in something along the lines of, "He has a body again! Let him live a little!" or "Wow, you still have a limb left!". But the first was very true, as Bakura _was_ indeed doing things a disembodied spirit couldn't do. Like for instance realizing somebody had looked at your super-secret list of things to do with a new body. Like are sadistic little angel was doing right at this moment.

"WHO LOOKED AT MY THINGS TO DO WITH A NEW BODY LIST!!" The dark spirit bellowed after he noticed that his secret drawer where he kept the list was half-way opened. His reddish-brownish eyes filled with anger as he looked around the room. The cat, Prince Cake-Waffles V (Ryou named him after is younger sister Amanes pet hamster that died around the same time she did), was innocently licking his paw. The fish, Mau (yes, Bakura had named the fish), was circling the tank for the 100th time this morning. Bakura's eyes hovered to a picture of Ryou hanging on the wall.

He narrowed his eyes. "Ryou…" he whispered under his breath. That little albino fruitcake would get a very, very hard beating after school. Bakura grabbed the list, crumpling it a little bit. He looked over it. _Snowball fight_. Check. _Put whipped cream on Ryou's face while he's sleeping_. Check. The list continued much like that. Bakura slammed the list down on the coffee table, about to boil in his own anger and frustration until "Rachel Ray" came on in an hour, when something on the list caught his eye.

_Go on a date with a girl_. There was no checkmark near it and it was hidden on the back of the paper. _Go on a date with a girl…_ the words echoed in Bakuras head. Slowly he sat down on the couch. Valentines day was coming up… but where would he find a girl?

As if on queue, Prince Cake-Waffles V's paw hit the remote that lay on the couch as the beer bottles had pretty much taken all the space on the coffee table. The TV turned on and a man with a beard and a hoarse voice started talking about an online dating site called "Cupid's Arrow". Bakura now had all attention on the commercial. A man and a woman who were kissing and gazing into each others eyes lovingly stated how easy it was and how it really works. The ugly old man popped up on the screen and told the web address, and then the commercial ended.

Bakura's mouth hung open for a few seconds before he raced off the couch and to the computer. His hands flying over the keyboard, he typed in and found himself looking at a pink and purple screen, Cupid's Arrow in large, flowery letters in the corner of the page. The ugly man from the commercial was on the screen pointing at Bakura, above him floaty pink words spelling out "Find your soul mate in time for Valentines! Get a Cupid's Arrow account!".

A clever smirk began to form on Bakura's face as he created an account and his search for a soul mate began.

* * *

The door to the apartment flew open as a tired Ryou Bakura walked into the apartment. "Hello, Bakura?" he called as he dropped his bag on the floor and took off the jacket of his blue school uniform to reveal a white shirt. When there was no answer, Ryou started getting worried. What if Bakura had done something? What if there was a dead body under his bed again? "Bakura!?" he called again, this time his voice cracking.

Ryou slowly grabbed a baseball bat and inched into his bedroom. "Hey Ry- oof!" Bakura started too say before he was hit by the bat.

"Bakura! You startled me!" Ryou gasped, afraid of what his yami would do to him and even more afraid of what his yami was doing in his bedroom.

"I noticed," Bakura hissed getting up. He had a large bleeding cut on the side of his face. Slowly he wiped the blood off with his finger and licked the blood off that.

Ryou stared at Bakura, because, for one Bakura hadn't hurt Ryou yet, and number two, Bakura was wearing straight black pants and black shirt. He was also wearing shoes, and… had he shaved?

"Now get out of my, way weak one, _I_ have a date tonight." Bakura smirked as he walked into the living room.

Ryou stood silently for awhile before he spun around and followed Bakura. "A date!?"

"You seem surprised," the 5000 year old spirit replied, not looking up.

"Who would date you!?"

"In my time I was quite the ladies man." Bakura replied firmly.

"You mean a pimp?" Ryou asked with all innocence.

"Shut up," Bakura hissed as he slipped on Ryou's gold watch.

A knock came from the door. "That should be Scarlett!" Bakura yelped, trying to hide his excitement. Ryou opened the door and an exceptionally beautiful young lady walked inside the apartment. Ryou's mouth dropped open at the lady in the short black dress and promiscuous look in her eye blew a kiss to Bakura.

Bakura returned her gaze with his own promiscuous glare as he walked out the door with the strange woman. "If I'm not back by one, be happy for me." He called to Ryou as he walked out the door, leaving his young, confused hikari speechless.


End file.
